TACO DEL MEME pt. 1

     A little while ago I started working on a series of internet memes that involved one of my favorite foods, the Taco and some of the best cinematic romances of all time. The two combined are of course a perfect match.

     I have only previously released them on my Facebook and they can also be seen on www.icanhascheezburger.com. The site with all the hilarious LOL Cats. They also have a MEME maker on the site, which I have used a plethora of times, as well as to make the Taco MEMES.

*Fun Fact: The title "TACO DEL MEME" is a play on this awesome Subway styled burrito shop that lets you build your own burrito. It's called "Taco Del Mar". An interesting side note to this fun fact is that one of the gentleman in the MEMEs is a character named "Ennis Del Mar", played by the late Heath Ledger, in "Brokeback Mountain". That character's name is how I always remembered the name of that food dispensary.

So without further ado:

Assassin's Creed Black Flag Reveal!!!

     Here it is, the first trailer for "Assassin's Creed IV Black Flag" due out this october.

    
     I'm pretty excited for this new game. Rumor has it that the main Assassin in this pirate themed game is Edward Kenway, the father of Hatham Kenway and grandfather to Connor Kenway, the protagonist of Assassin's Creed III. Perhaps we will learn why Hatham inevitably joins them damned Templars. For Playstation 3 players, we are further treated by Ubisoft once again by exclusive content. Thanks in advance Ubisoft!

     I was hoping that the game would have initially been released in the spring of 2014, like it was originally stated to be. I don't want the Assassin's Creed series to be an annually released series, such as Call of Duty or Madden NFL. Those other games never offer up any real innovations and are essentially the very same game every year that suckers continue to buy. Alas I am now one of those suckers with Assassin's Creed. This is now the sixth game in the series, 5 of which have been annual.

     On a side note, I really hope they keep from using any lame ass references to those shitty Pirates of the Caribbean films. I swear if any one asks where the rum is, I will not be a happy camper.

HE'S BACK!!!

Finally, Arnold is making his triumphant return to the action genre that he cornerstoned back in the long, long ago! I'm not talking about the Expendables 2 either. Which needless to say I'm totally fucking amped for, and comes out today :D [Due to this small town's limited theater, I won't be able to watch it for a while... Sadface] No, Arnold is back and ready to take some asses and kick some names! Wait.. fuck it. HE'S BACK!!!

I'm talking of course, about "The Last Stand", which features the former Governator as a small town sheriff as the last defense against some mad drug dealers fleeing for the border. I hope they packed some Depends in the back of their rides, because they will be sure as hell shitting their britches before they get past Arnold and that giant hand cannon!!

 

I have a massive erection from the excitement.

Movies like this are seldom seen these days, and as sad as I am to admit it, it's because of the Comic Book Film craze. When I was a kid, I always looked forward to the new Arnold movie, even if it was rated R and I had to wait till it's eventual VHS release. Now thanks to Stallone, we have a much needed resurgence of the Action genre that goes back to it's 80/90's hay day. Unlike the Expendables though, where it's the ultimate team of bad asses, we have the master, in all his Austrian glory!!! So without further ado, here is the official first trailer of Arnold's most welcomed return! 

Oh Gotye... NSFW

Everytime I hear a song by Gotye, or even just his name, I think of this. And now, so will you!

You're very welcome :D

Batman & Robin... UHG!!!

     What can I say about this movie that hasn't been said before. It's quite literally the gayest thing I've ever seen, and I've seen gay dudes make out in my living room, so yeah. The Bat-Nipples, the bad puns, the day-glo and neon, the poor use of excellent source material, the campiness from the 60's Adam West series, Alicia Silverstone lol This movie is utter dog shit.

     As much as I razz on this shitty piece of shit, I do not hate this movie. In fact, I'm watching it right now, I chose this over a newer episode of "The Simpsons" [which is a totally other piece of shit these days and I'll get to that later]. I watch Batman and Robin pretty much every time I see it on TV, as long as I'm in control of the remote or I have time to literally waste. Because lets face it, one does not better themselves by watching this horribly made movie.

    On one hand, I have to thank Joel Schumacher,  because if he didn't murder this franchise the way he did, Christopher Nolan wouldn't of been able to bless us with the epicness of the Dark Knight Trilogy. The third chapter of that series is actually out next weekend, and this nerd is certainly very excited to sit down and watch it.

     On the other hand, Schumacher had to put this vile, putrid, hunk of moose dooky into theaters. When I was a kid and this movie first came out, I was very, very excited to watch it. Like most kids, I was super stoked for Batman anything. I had a bajillion different action figures, I used to make my own Bat-Cave playsets out of cardboard boxes, but I never got to see this movie in the theater, I didn't come from a family that was very well off, so movies were a luxury. Looking back, I'm glad my mommy didn't waste what little sheckles we had to watch this. I watched it on one of the premium movie channels. I will admit, that I actually did not hate it all. I like George Clooney, I obviously love Ahnuld. [He follows me on twitter BTW]

     How could this be bad, is all I could think. It seems I tend to look at Batman with rose colored glasses or something. In my heart though, I knew it was shit. I couldn't stand how bright it was, or the shitty jokes. The acting was just terrible. There is a reason why Alicia Silverstone isn't aloud in movies any more. She chews up every scene she's in like that dog in "Turner and Hooch" chewing on Tom Hanks car seat. I loved her in "Clueless" and I didn't mind her in the animated series "Brace Face", but c'mon, lets face it. She's probably the worst. If you need further proof, watch the sequel the live action Scooby Doo movie.

     This movie is a train wreck in every sense of the word. I can't keep my eyes off it. It's so awful. I'm such a fool for watching it. I know what the outcome is, I know it's not going to be good, yet I watch it, every single time that it's on! That's probably what I hate the most about it. I'm always drawn in.

   
     I don't really have too much more to say. So I will end this with pretty much the sole reason I watch it...


                                                ICE RELATED PUNS!!!!

Reality huh?

I moved to Newfoundland a few weeks ago and in that time I've been reintroduced to daily tv. Mostly reality shows.

When I was little I hated when grown ups would pop channels like tlc, discovery and especially A&E. But now I'm in my mid twenties and it's all I watch now. Especially for shows like Storage Wars or Barter Kings. I've always like Mythbusters and How It's Made on discovery. I also got into some weirder shows like Duck Dynasty and Cajun Justice.

These shows aren't even that good, but at the same time, their super interesting seeing what these folks get on with.

5 reasons I think soccer is gay. by Justin

As a geek, I don't get too much pleasure out of sports. I prefer to watch Kevin Smith movies or play my PS3. This doesn't mean I hate sports. At least entirely. I love Lacrosse, and I'd love to learn how to golf. But most sports, at least for me are just more fun to play than watch.

Golf, football (I mostly prefer the playing catch aspect), Hockey, are sports I enjoy playing. I used to play a lot of backyard sports when I was much younger. The only sport I actually played in a league.. was soccer. Now I was 4 years old, and didn't really have much to say in the matter. My cousin was on a team, so I joined in. I don't remember very much about it except that I had a few trophies and apparently I would cry when no one would pass me the ball. A kid crying at 4 years old cause his team mates won't share, is nothing to be ashamed of. Anyways I've never really liked soccer. In fact I pretty much despise it. So here is 5 reasons that I made up on the spot earlier tonight, completely for no apparent reason, that I think soccer is gay!

Numero I:

You can't use your hands!!
Where the hell is the fun in that? Sure it's challenging, but it's fucking stupid

Numero II:

The nets are too big!
A hockey net is a great size, because one person can block it. The net for a soccer goal is like the size of four 67' Cadillac's stacked together!! Props to any single goaltender that can keep from getting scored on, cause seriously I wouldn't even bother showing up.

Numero III:

World Cup.
World cup happens every few years or so, I don't know how many, because I don't give a fuck, and everybody makes a big deal about it. The reality is though, most of those same people don't give a rats ass about soccer. But because it's a big event, they all gotta show their fakeness by rooting for teams that arent even from their own country. Fucking fake ass bitches.

Numero IV:

High socks.
Wearing your socks pulled all the way up when you have shorts on, is the stupidest look ever... topped only by stir-up pants in baseball!!

And finally the last and probably most important reason I think soccer is gay:

Numero V:

MEGA MAN SOCCER


I'm tempted to just leave it at that. If you've ever played this game, you will know what an utter piece of dog shit it is. I don't even want to bother to review it. IT SUCKS BALLS.
The END



-Justin

Playstation THREE by Justin

Hey all, just did a minor addition to the bloggy blog. If you peer over to your right you will see my PS3 gamer tag. Feel free to add me to your system if you gots one and yous wants to play some games wif me!! Anyways yeah, I have seen these things on message boards for a long time now and for some odd reason I never had one. Which is stupid cuz I love my PS3 and I play it all the time. I'm currently playing "Star Wars the Force Unleashed II" for like the third or fourth time. I think this game is a lot of fun to play. And I'm only 2 trophies away from having platinum (100% trophies for the game). So yeah nothing major, but something fun to peek at on the sidelines lol Till next time..

Peace

-Justin

I.D.G.A.F. by Justin

So some of you may know this and have seen it, but for the most part it's not been shared at all. I have a little green sketchbook that I started doing doodles and sketches in, roughly a year ago. In this little green sketchbook also has several little comic strips that I made. Mostly based on true stories or conversations from my everyday life... because I'm a shitty writer and can't think of anything to do myself hahaha. Besides, the best inspiration is drawn from your own experiences :d

Anyways while I was at C4 comic con last weekend, I had teh esteemed pleasure of sharing a table with 3 gentlemen from a website called www.3inq.com. These gentlemen really were a treat for me, as they were funny as hell, and into homo-erotic humor. I showed them said green sketchbook and it was a hit. Which personally was nice to know that relative strangers thought my stuff was good as opposed to just a few close friends, family and, my girlfriend.. all whom are biased.

So after glancing at my book, they said I should do daily comics for their website. I was flabbergasted at the offer. I obviously accepted, but declined on the notion of it being daily, as I am not a good writer and would not be able to make that kind of a deadline. We agreed on Weekly, which is fine, because that gives me the option to try to make a new strip to add, or just fall back on the ones I already have.... and with the exception of maybe 4 people, nobody would know hahahha

So I thought this would be a good time to be like a non-gay George Lucas. I started digitally remastering my work, so that I could share it with a broader audience. Also I gave it a title. "I.D.G.A.F." Which of course is an acronym for "I don't give a fuck" lol I also decided that this would be the opportune time to add wonderful technicolor and do minor editorial changes. Things that were funny a year ago, may not be now.



Also for the sake of making their site more popular, although that may stop immediately since I've come aboard, I will only be posting the comic strips exclusively to 3inq.com. Until they kick me off the site hahaha

So I hope you check their site, and bookmark it and all that jazz. It's pretty good. "Buddy Cop", a video project of theirs is soo funny. Get down there and have a good time!! Also the book "Victor's Legacy" which is about Frankenstein's monster in a zombie infested post apocalyptic world, is really good. The first 5 chapters are online, or you could be awesome and just purchase the entire first volume in graphic novel form. I have a copy, (and it's signed, bitches) It's a fantastic read!!! The website is at the bottom of the page, as well as the facebook fan page of Merk, the artist behind "Victor's Legacy"

Your assignment is to enjoy our shit, no go forth and be free... whatever the fuck that means!!

-Justin


www.3inq.com
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/pages/Merk/135968200630

Movember!!! by Justin

IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEEAARRR!!!! That's right, Movember is back!!! Fall is here, time to keep your upper lip warm with a beautiful and elegant mustache! I started growing in the rest of my goatee back in September. I normally have just the chin. Last year, I started growing Nov. 1st and I had to wait till the end of the month to finally have a really nice stache, only to have to shave it off for the end of the month. Now thanks to pregrowing and shaving off the chin bits, I have a spectacular handlebar mustache, that I will be making smaller every week of the month, leaving me with something similar to what Charlie Chaplin donned on his face oh so many years ago!!!



Movember is not only about looking bad ass, it's about spreading awareness about men's health issues. The most predominant being Prostate cancer. Which takes way too many lives, every day. I'm not about to get a flow chart going, or post some statistics or anything. But it's super serial. Mustache's have been given a bad rap over the last 12 years or so. It seem's that they are solely for Hockey players during playoff season and porn stars, in porno season. I think if we all look back at photo albums, our father's rocked some pretty sweet mustaches as a day to day look. I know for at least for me, whenever my dad, or my late Uncle Roy, when they were clean shaven it was difficult to recognize them!!! Obviously now, in my mid twenties, I don't find it hard to recognize who my father is, but I still pester him from time to time to grow it again, for me lol Have you ever seen Sam Elliott without his face snuggler? He is still very handsome, but I can't help but stare at the void under his nose! There's just an empty space where a mustache should be!!! It doesn't look right! It is something that definitely suits him, like other mustache enthusiasts, such as Tom Selleck and Burt Reynolds. These men are cinematic icons... as well as icons for epic bad assery! Can you imagine what Hulk Hogan would look like clean shaven? I don't even want to live in that world! Hell even Ben Affleck, who is one of people magazine's sexiest man of the year award winners, rocked a full on handlebar stache in Smokin' Aces.He looked fucking awesome as shit! He was also killed off in said film, but that is beside the point XD So come on my fellow Y chromosomers, get that stache growing, the ladies will thank you for it, your upper lip will thank you for it, and in December when you look back at the previous month you will not regret it!!! -Justin